The craziest thing each NFL team put in their schedule release video

“I want my quarter back.” “Sorry, Shedeur is off this week.” That highlighted Cleveland’s Street Fighter CLE-themed schedule release video. How ironic if the Browns don’t start Sanders in favor of Deshaun Watson.

Nothing says fall like weddings and football. Well, in the Baltimore Ravens case, they decided to have Zay Flowers crash a wedding of Baltimore fans and give every wedding participant a ticket to a game this year. And just when you’re patiently waiting for the full schedule to release, the credits roll with polaroid shots from the wedding. Well done.

If you didn’t know what a “yinzer” was before the Steelers released their schedule on Thursday night, you do now. Everything about that schedule release screamed Pittsburgh and that type of authenticity should be applauded.

The ball drop reference as a clip of Lamar Jackson fumbling against the Bengals is … chef’s kiss. That’s the type of creativity and jabs you take at division rivals. Baltimore could very well be their biggest division rival and that game on New Year’s Eve could have a lot of playoff implications.

The ’90s called. They want their schedule release back.

— Kansas City Chiefs

Whew, this social media and multimedia team is so good! I watched five other videos before we finally got a Mike Vrabel-Dianna Russini reference. It was a subtle message popup in the Halo and gaming-themed video. The Chargers never disappoint with their creative jabs and unique way of releasing their schedule.

In a spin-off of Step Brothers, Kirk Cousins and Fernando Mendoza go from enemies to best friends as the two will battle it out for the Week 1 starting job. Watching the Raiders’ release video, it almost feels like the signed Cousins strictly because Mendoza is a carbon copy of him.

It’s hard to choose between Aquib Talib’s chain “infomercial” or Denver’s reimagination of The Pitt, a hit TV show on HBO, working with a Steelers fan. Either way, Peyton Manning making yet another cameo on camera is the easiest way to get your viewership numbers up.

It was unique, but it wasn’t that great. Brian Cushing was a great addition (especially if you remember how animated he used to get during games). It’s a different twist than most teams and really wasn’t noteworthy. Hopefully their season will be better than this release video.

You can never go wrong with a Simpsons themed schedule release. Finding all the perfect moments from the Simpsons to take jabs at your division foes (and the Cleveland Browns) is what the NFL schedule release hype is all about.

It’s so hard to choose a favorite but the Fernando Mendoza fake doppelganger and the Joe Burrow jab at using McCauley Caulkin for his picture are two of the top moments. This video was funny, it was entertaining, short and sweet. You never know who you’ll run into in Nashville!

Did Trevor Lawrence really get his hair cut? That’s the only thing you’re asking yourself after watching the schedule release video. Is Lawrence, Chad Powers? I have no idea who the Jags are playing and when, but I do want to know if Lawrence getting a haircut for the schedule release was staged or not.

Could you imagine if Rick Ross actually took over for Stephen Ross (Dolphins owner) for a day? Well the Miami Dolphins players couldn’t believe it. When they got pulled out of practice, saying that “Mr. Ross” wants to see them, every single one of them tensed up. That is until famous Miami rapper Rick Ross was behind the desk.

I’m sure you’ve seen those mesmerizing videos of all these exotic colors getting mixed to create more common colors. The Jets took that and created each NFL team on their schedule’s unique team color. I thought it would be boring. Yet, I still watched the entire video.

The Patriots went a different route, leaning on the heart strings of fans using dogs. You can never go wrong with dogs … unless you’re a cat person, in which you might not like this video. Nothing too much to it, just good ol’ fashioned banter narrated over dogs fighting over stuffed animals of the Patriots’ opponents.

If the schedule release is foreshadowing Buffalo’s season, yikes! It wasn’t exactly a riveting video, though the barbershop quartet tune was catchy. But when Josh Allen said he wants a giant, swinging slimy chrysalis in the release video, you oblige.

This was the most boring schedule release video I’ve ever been forced to watch. Jalen Hurts, Jordan Mailata, Saquan Barkley, Jordan Davis and Jihad Campbell opened envelopes and talked about the schedule. It was 13 minutes of my life I’ll never get back.

Every second of the Cowboys’ 2:59 charades-inspired reveal was better than any single second of the Eagles’ 13-minute reveal. It was honestly healing.